The following are quotes I've collected over the past several months that I find particularly entertaining:

To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it.
- GK Chesterton

If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.
- Mark Twain

He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas of any man I ever met.
- Abraham Lincoln

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.
- Leo Tolstoy

“Those that hate goodness are sometimes nearer than those that know nothing at all about it and think they have it already.”
- CS Lewis, The Great Divorce

"An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is an adventure wrongly considered."
- GK Chesterton

“I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.”
- Mark Twain

“Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.”
- Mark Twain

“This is one of those views which are so absolutely absurd that only very learned men could possibly adopt them.”
- Bertrand Russell

“It is always easier to believe than to deny. Our minds are naturally affirmative.”
- John Burroughs

“Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.”
- Albert Einstein

“We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.”
- Winston Churchill

“What does a fish know about the water in which it swims all its life?”
- Albert Einstein

“When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my own country. I make up for lost time when I come home.”
- Winston Churchill

“I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.”
- Mark Twain

“When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber.”
- Winston Churchill

“Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked.”
- Peter de Vries

"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."
- Winston Churchill

“The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none.”
- Thomas Carlyle

Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.
- Mark Twain

In the midst of a world of light and love, of song and feast and dance, [Lucifer] could find nothing to think of more interesting than his own prestige.
- CS Lewis

Experience is the ability to recognize a mistake the second time you make it.

Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to be always part of unanimity.
- Christopher Morley

“A man’s face is his autobiography. A woman’s face is her work of fiction.”
- Oscar Wilde

Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain

Some things have to be believed to be seen.
- Ralph Hodgson

Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.
- Albert Einstein